Genesis Page 5

  His soft groan tickled my neck, sending shivers along my spine. “Very well.” He moved out from behind me, the air shifting again—growing thick, almost tangible.

  “Hello, Lily,” he murmured, stepping out of a background that danced for a moment.

  Her eyes widened in shock, but soon carried only one emotion: pure love. I hoped one day I would be able to give that sort of look to a man.

  Soon, I told myself.

  She walked forward, but he held up a hand. “Do not touch me.”

  She nodded, circling him, eating up every bit of him with her eyes. She appeared so young, but I knew she had to be pushing a hundred.

  I should have felt uncomfortable, but for some reason, I was right at home watching this play out like a movie I’d longed to see.

  “How have you been?” she asked. The shyness in her tone surprised me.

  He chuckled. “Lonely.”

  She didn’t laugh at that, instead, she stared at him, compassion softening her lips. “I never wanted that. Just because I chose a life of solitude didn’t mean you had to follow.”

  “I wasn’t ready to move on, Lily. I have missed you every day since we parted, and I will continue to miss you for the rest of eternity. You brought joy to my half-life. For that, I will always be grateful. I am…sorry—”

  She put pale fingers to his lips. “I will hear none of that. It is I who should be thanking you. You showed me what true love was. I will take you with me into eternity, Taveon. No matter what happens to me, you will always own my heart.”

  Silent tears wet my cheeks, as if I was heart-deep into a Shakespearean tragedy. This was wrong. There should be a way for them to be together. Wasn’t love supposed to conquer all? These two had the purest love I had ever witnessed, yet they would be forever separated. How was that fair?

  I stepped back, not able to bear the heartache in their eyes. I couldn’t stand to see this: my fear coming to life before me. Man, I wanted to love like they had, but look what it had done to them. Could I go through that? Did I even want to?

  For the first time I realized just how much it would suck to be fae. Even if Taylor found someone to love later on, he would be permanently damaged from the loss of Lily.

  “You have done much good with your life,” Taylor said softly. “Just as I knew you would.”

  She nodded, smiling. “I’m sorry it hasn’t been more. I had hoped to find a way to stop the Order for good, but I will not be here to witness their end.”

  “How long?” Taylor asked, his face turning the color of soot right in front of us.

  “Hours now, my love.” She reached out, cupping his cheek. “I want you to find love again. Promise me.”

  He raised his hand, gently molding it to hers. “I will try.”

  She smiled, the result bringing youth to her face. “I better head back. I have things to tidy up in my office. Thank you for giving me one last look at you.” She let out a small laugh. “I think it might just last through eternity.”

  When she turned to walk away, I hissed, “Aren’t you going to kiss her goodbye?”

  His lips went all stern. “I have already allowed too much contact. I will be punished.”

  I gave him a sly smile, “Then what are you waiting for? You’ve already screwed up, right? Might as well make it worth it. Besides, you can always blame me. You are trying to win me.”

  To my surprise, he didn’t need any other encouragement. She was nearly to the edge of the clearing when he caught up to her. He didn’t say a word. He simply pulled her into his arms. I turned around to give them what privacy I could.

  Time crawled while I studied the bushes. Pretty soon though, Taylor was at my side. “We had best head back.”

  He was doing it again. Concealing his hurt under a façade of calm.

  I took his hand, hoping he had given Lily the best kiss of her life, but knowing it would be a haunting moment for him for eternity.

  “Please stop,” he said in a voice so fragile porcelain could crush it.

  I’d forgotten about him being in my mind. “Sorry. Are you okay?”

  He nodded, and without warning me, we were floating on the matter stream back to Uldran. This time when we emerged, I noticed a heavy pull to the air. The oppression of being buried by water closed in on me immediately. How could these people stand to live here?

  Taylor let go of my hand and started for his house. I wanted to give him some room, but I also wanted to be there for him. I didn’t know what to do, so I just stayed close, hoping at some point he would talk to me.

  We made it to the foyer before he said a word. “I think I will lie down for a while, Rayla. Please make yourself at home. A meal awaits you on the terrace.” He patted my hand. “Thank you for coming with me.”

  When he walked away, I grabbed his forearm. “I’m here if you want to talk.”

  He stared at the floor. “I am not in the mood, but I will let you know if I change my mind.”

  I don’t know why I did it, but I pulled him into a hug. At first he was stiff. I thought for sure he would push away from me, but he let me hold him. His body trembled like a newborn colt while his controlled tears broke my heart. After I pulled him tighter, he buried his head into my shoulder. His wracking sobs shook us both, but I managed to keep my emotions locked inside. He needed me to be strong for him.

  “It’s okay,” I crooned, running a hand across his hair. “It will be okay.”

  I held him for what felt like forever, yet no time at all passed before he pulled away from me, clearing his throat as if he was embarrassed. “I need to be alone.” Without another word he started down the hall again. This time I let him go.

  Boys had never made any sense to me and that seemed to translate into fae men as well. I headed to the terrace. The bright day should have uplifted me. So why was I picking at my food even though I was famished?

  Deciding I couldn’t eat, I wandered for a while, taking in how vast this place was. Unlike my original thoughts on Uldran, there were no glass domes in sight. In fact, if I didn’t know where I was, I would have thought I was in the Midwest, somewhere in the country.

  After a while another property came into view between two towering maples. The expansive estate dwarfed Taylor’s modest home. Seemed weird to me that the current lord of air wouldn’t have better digs. The modern design belonged on the pages of a trendy magazine, all sleek lines with white everywhere, as if no other color existed. It stood out like a gigantic marshmallow plunked into the middle of a cup of hot chocolate. It was also exactly what I had pictured Taylor living in originally. How wrong I had been about him. He did have feelings; he just never showed them.

  Something in the air shifted, bringing me out of my musings. Every tiny hair on my arms and neck stood straight up. I glanced around me, trying to shrug off the feeling. A hiss sounded behind me. Did they really have to bring snakes under the ocean? If I was deciding what creatures to house in a realm, it certainly wouldn’t be freaking snakes.

  Another hiss. I whirled around, checking the grass, but I couldn’t see anything. I hadn’t even thought about wandering this place without Taylor. The sound came again, this time closer. Nothing seemed out of the ordinary, but my hackles were definitely up.

  “One thing I should have mentioned before is for you to stay close.”

  I clutched my chest, whirling around. “Man, you scared me! Didn’t your mother ever teach you not to sneak up on people?”

  Taylor laughed. “She may have mentioned it, but you deserved it.”

  “Oh, really?”

  Anxiety lingered in the set of his mouth for a moment before it transmuted into frustration. “I am meant to protect you? Have you forgotten how many people are searching for you now?”

  I guess I sort of did. Lucky for me my stalker had been Taylor. I smiled sheepishly. “I wish! Hey, are there snakes down here?”

  The muscles in his jaw hardened. “Not that I am aware of. Why?”

  “I just thought I
heard hissing, is all.”

  His tongue shot out to slide along his lower lip before his chest rose with a sharp breath. “Couldn’t have been.” His eyes darted behind me, and something about how he was acting made me know he was hiding something from me. There was no use in confronting him because he could read my mind.

  Tell me when you’re ready. I’m not as fragile as you think, I thought at him before I faced the odd house. “Whose is it?”

  “Mine,” he said as if I should have known.

  Oookay. “Mind explaining why we are living in your guest house then?”

  He glanced at his manor, but didn’t linger. “I have not lived there for many years now.”

  It took me longer than it should have to realize I was making his pain over losing Lily worse. Pulling my foot out of my mouth, I said, “I didn’t mean to make you think about her again.”

  “It was an honest mistake, Rayla. Do not worry about it.” He looked at the house again. “In fact, would you like to see it?”

  Oh, was this really a good idea? He was already sullen.

  I wanted check it out, though. Maybe seeing it again would help him get over her.

  Planting a firm smile on my face, I stepped up beside him. “Lead the way.”

  Chapter Three

  Taylor didn’t say much as we approached the property. Everything seemed to be in its place. The grounds were manicured to perfection, and the exterior glimmered as if freshly washed. When he opened the oversized front door, I let out a little gasp.

  The foyer gave way to an enormous room that looked more like an art gallery than anything resembling a living area. Primitive sculptures rested on pedestals while others were housed in glass cases. Several paintings hung on the walls. I didn’t recognize the artist, but what wonderful compositions. I moved closer, admiring the fluid brush strokes using monochromatic color schemes.

  “Where did you get all of these?” Had he robbed the Louvre before it became a museum?

  He laughed, the sound rather pleasant. It shouldn’t have surprised me. Just like Jett, Taylor’s major weapon against me was his voice. Sultry and smooth, it nearly melted me just to listen to him say the most mundane things. “I paid for every one of these pieces, Rayla.”

  I nodded, not really listening. I didn’t want to disrupt the reverent atmosphere any more than I already had. A perfectly good bench sat about four feet from one of the paintings. I took the opportunity to plant myself on the closest edge. Taylor slid in beside me, gazing up, his expression soft.

  “Who’s the artist?” I asked when I had finally had my feel of looking at the landscape. A tiny cottage could be seen off in the distance with sheep dotting the hills surrounding it. If I stepped a few feet closer, I was sure I would be transported to that hillside. The artist had used so many hues of green, the painting had the understated elements of a black and white photograph.

  “Lily,” he said softly. “This is my favorite. It was the last one she gave me before I returned her to the mortal realm.”

  “I thought you said you paid for everything in here.”

  “Are you suggesting I haven’t?”

  So much for trying to lighten the mood. I shook my head. I had no idea Sister Mary Margaret painted. She probably didn’t, yet Lily had. It was weird, but I thought of her as two different people.

  Taylor looked sharply at me. “It is refreshing to know I am not the only one to think that about her.”

  I continued to study the painting, but now that I had him talking, I wanted him to continue. “Will you tell me more about her?”

  The smile that crept along his lips actually lit his honey eyes. Astonishing.

  “She was a handful from the start, demanding I take her back to her mother. She actually yelled at me for three days straight, only stopping when fatigue wore her out. The minute she awoke, she was back at it.”

  “Isn’t that unusual? I mean, I thought the bond was supposed to make Elementals mindless.”

  “There is much you don’t understand about the bond, Rayla. I realize why it would appear that way; still, you are correct about one thing. Lily and I didn’t have an immediate connection. It took longer than it should have for her to be comfortable with me.”

  “She did seem to be rather angry at you for a very long time.”

  He chuckled. “I knew she was keeping the diary. We aren’t supposed to allow our bondmate to document their time in the realms. Not since we learned the Order uses them to glean information about us. I should have taken it from her before I returned her, but I was hopeful it would be a comfort for her. Unfortunately, the Order confiscated it almost immediately. I was not able to retrieve it for her and she seemed to be adjusting to convent life quickly. I thought she would be better off thinking of our time together as a dream.”

  That was a very specific comment. “Did she tell you that?”

  He chuckled. “She talked in her sleep. I should have stayed away from her, but I couldn’t.”

  “You’re a stalker,” I teased.

  “She was my life for so long. I found it hard to let her go.”

  “Was she your first bondmate?”

  “I had many before her, but those were different.”

  I gave him a cursory once over. “How so?”

  He frowned thoughtfully. “She broke me. I had been able to keep a safe distance in other relationships. They were more like a business agreement than a marriage. But with her, I couldn’t keep myself aloof for long. She was life, Rayla.” A tear streaked down his cheek. He stood. “Would you like to see the rest?”

  I nodded. What a revelation this had been. I was beginning to understand the mind of a fae lord; however, I wanted to know for sure. “Do most lords treat bonding as a business arrangement?”

  He stopped and faced me. “Many do. I am unsure if it is most.”

  “Why? I thought the more you give to the relationship, the more power you get.”

  “Technically, that is true. Let me explain it this way. If you knew you could learn to completely control your powers, that you could send that certain princess we all despise to the utmost end of the universe with a flick of the wrist, that you could erase all the harm caused by the Order, that you could create the reality you wanted…” My ears perked up. “What would you give to gain that?”

  Man, just about anything at this point. “Are you being serious?”

  “As a matter of fact, I am. All you have to do is give everything you are when you bond.”

  Oh. Could I do that?

  “Not so easy is it?”

  “Why does this have to be so complicated?”

  “It isn’t for ordinary Elementals. If you were like the rest, you would have one lord devoting himself to you, and depending on how much of himself he was willing to give, you would be overcome by his feelings for you. Compulsion is our main weapon. You have to understand that by now, but once the bond is made, compulsion no longer works. If the bond is complete, it magnifies feelings to the point of domination.”

  Good to know. “So what happened to make your bond with Lily fragile?”

  “I was attracted to her.”

  I did a double take, sure I had misheard him. “I don’t get it. Aren’t you usually attracted to Elementals you bond with?”

  “Yes and no. Once a connection is established, we don’t have to work all that hard to keep our bondmate happy. She is pleased to merely be with us…usually.”

  “How very convenient for you.” Stupid Faine. Why did she do this? I was back to wanting to punch her.

  “It is interesting you bring that up,” Taylor said, interrupting my thoughts. “Most of the ways we are able to control an Elemental originated from her desire to protect her children.”

  Well that just sucked. Anger crept through my body. Here I had everything most women could ever ask for. Although, if they knew what they would be getting, I no longer thought they would wish such a thing on themselves. I had five men devoted to me. Five extraordinary men who
all wanted me. The question still remained. Why?

  Power wasn’t a good enough motivation for me. None of them knew me. It wasn’t as if we had been lifelong friends. What could I hope to gain from having a relationship with any of them if I would always question why they really wanted me? It was like marrying for money or position. Civilized people just don’t do that sort of thing. Okay, maybe they did, but they shouldn’t.

  I felt Taylor’s fingers on my arm. “Things have gotten out of hand where Elementals are concerned. You are right to be angry, but you could change it all. Remember that.”

  The burden of his words hit my shoulders. I was already weighed down enough.

  He frowned. “I am sorry to bring you more to worry about. I merely seek to help you see what your options are, my lady.”

  I raised a brow. “So now we’re back to my lady?” I captured his gaze. “What happened to you using my name?”

  He took an awkward step back. “I have not been myself the last few days.”

  “Safe distance, right?”

  He nodded.

  How could I blame him? It wasn’t as if he was a frontrunner for becoming my bondmate.

  He cringed.

  “Stay out of my head if you don’t really want to know how I feel.”

  “You don’t even know how you feel, Rayla.”

  Without even realizing what I was doing, I slammed my fist against the wall. “I know, and I hate it! I can’t tell what’s real anymore. I can’t tell if someone is manipulating me or if I have a true connection to anyone. My heart tells me I love three men right now, Taylor. How. Is. That. Possible?”

  He attempted to touch my shoulder, but I backed away from him. Compassion settled in his eyes. “The human heart is capable of feeling for more than one person at once.”

  “That’s comforting.”

  He laughed, giving me almost a shy look. I would have bought it more if his smirk hadn’t been there. “If you bonded with me, you wouldn’t have to worry about it.”

  Great. We were back to that again.

  “You are not even willing to try. I might surprise you.”